Mel Owen-Browne, our Homeopath here at Winchester Sports and Spine started writing a teenager series last month and the issue of exam performance and anxiety was discussed. This month, the topic is peer pressure and bullying, which starts in primary schools but is most common during puberty and adolescence and can take many forms.
Bullying and Peer Pressure:
Verbal harassment , teasing, being got at, friendship exclusion, name calling, physical threats and attacks, insults about parents, theft and money extraction are all forms of bullying. Teenagers can respond in various ways but often, they shy away from talking about it and instead resort to becoming withdrawn and morose, refusing to go to school or playing truant. Some may resort to bullying other children.
Bullying isn’t always recognised in schools that verbal insults can be as damaging, if not more so than physical harassment. As parents, it is important to try to encourage your child to talk about it with you as you can then begin to understand and support them and relieve them of the burden. Many school have a bullying policy so it is worth following that up and making sure your child is getting the appropriate support there too. It is essential to allow your child to speak about the situation and express their feelings in a safe environment. Talking about it will help them to understand what is going on and for them to understand that it is important not to blame themselves. A bullied child will often think it is their fault and this will only serve to reinforce them as a victim and prolongs the cycle of bullying. Becoming serious and withdrawn at school will also attract more bullying so it is important to try and shift the cycle of behaviour.
In some situations, it is best for the child to just walk away and not react but at other times, they will need to learn to stand up for themselves and be assertive, giving the message of confidence and strength to the bully. Bullies will often pick on those he/she perceives to be weaker so this is an important part of breaking the abuse.
Homeopathic remedies can work on a child’s confidence and self esteem to help with this problem. I have listed a two helpful remedies below that you can buy over the counter to try. Buy the one that seems to fit your child most clearly and give it in a 30c potency morning and evening for a week or so. If you are not sure or would like help, a homeopathic consultation will look at the mental, emotional and physical constitution of your child and a remedy will be chosen to help bring about better self esteem and confidence in your child and help deal with any underlying issues.
- Staphysagria is often indicated where there is a feeling of mortification and humiliation due to being treated wrongly or abused.. They may store the emotions inside and feel a bit worthless, hard done by and will appear meek and mild in order to avoid confrontation. Alternatively, they will have sudden outbursts of emotion as they struggle to hold it in. This may be witnessed a lot at home.
- Lycopodium is for the child who feels inadequate and lacks self confidence. They often over compensate for this inner feeling of weakness by being domineering or diplaying bravado. The child who needs this remedy will either cower to avoid conflict or will become demanding and irritable at home or try bullying others who are weaker than themselves.
Mel is in clinic every Wednesday and one Saturday per month. If you have any questions about homeopathic remedies, do not hesitate to call her on 01962 843242